Apartment Hunting In SF: A Haiku In Five Parts / 22 March 1997 Before I begin my mini-epic, let me provide a bit of context. First, POP QUIZ: No. 1: Which is the bigger waste of time?
No. 2: Cutthroat scavengers who use underhanded, amoral techniques to create the illusion that they are more attractive potential tenants than I are:
No. 3: Looking for an apartment AND a job in San Francisco AT THE SAME TIME is:
Pencils up! I’m sorry if you had trouble with this quiz, since it was a little tricky. The correct answer to Nos. 1-3 is ALL OF THE ABOVE. Now, the epic haiku in five parts: Part I: Wandering Through the Blissful, Childlike Forest of My Own Naivete I need a new place Part II: Like Odysseus, My Journey is Fraught With Peril & Adventure What? I can’t afford Part III: The Enemy is Cunning & My Weapon is Dull Already rented? Part IV: Embrace the Sweet Solace of Desperation No indoor plumbing? Part V: Do You Know the Way to San Jose? O San Francisco Previously / So I Was Laid Off And Went On A Roadtrip |
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